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Silver Water

(Regular and unremitting except where pause is indicated)

A Underwater. Deep underwater

B No. Shallow water

A Deep Underwater

B Set sail in your deep water. Shallow water

A I could fuck you now

B Deep Underwater?

A In your shallow water

B I told you. Shallow water

A Deep Underwater

B There’s nobody there

A Let go of

B Yes?

A The things

B Oh yes

A The marriage

B Ha!

A The ring

B The clit ring? Ha Ha!

A For instance

B The rings

A Your head

B Deep underwater

A Shallow water

B I love Manhattan

A It too

B That

A It and That. Both shallow water

B Deep underwater?

A Say it once more

B Shallow water

A No. Say “deep underwater”

B Deep underwater?

A Say it once more

B No

A You must

B You dust

A Legs off, you must

B I’m stupid. Big tits

A Tango tits

B Remember the cross-your-heart?


B It fucking worked on you. You clown

A Let it go

B Why?

A It’s time

B It’s boring

A It’s transcendental meditation

B You fuck

A You fuck too

B This is boring

A I hate you

B Shallow water

A I won’t let you win

B You will beat me?

A No. I will not

B You will nerve me

A Nerve rain

B You rain I rain it rains

A I licked the rain

B Off my angry tits

A Deep underwater

B Shallow water

A Deep underwater

B Like me!

A Just once?

B Try

A It’s all a try

B Try harder

A Code for fuck

B Shallow water

A Deep underwater

B Ha!

A Your ceramic dildo

B That thing

A Let it go

B And walk funny?

A What’s funny?

B A camp Singaporean

A What?

B It’s a joke

A Deep underwater

B Shallow water

A Carry on

B Stop looking

A My eyes are closed

B Lose your anger

A Like a fish?

B Swim off

A To the sea?

B To shallow water

A Deep underwater

B Say what you mean

A I am trying

B Try harder

A Give me permission

B It’s too late

A Give it anyway

B Well. Yes

A No. Just “Yes”

B That’s worthless

A Deep underwater

B Shallow water

A It’s getting humid

B You stink now

A Now?

B You always did

A You always said so

B I could have done better

A Bowl of cherries

B Cherry

A Deep underwater

B Shallow water

A Smell it

B Then what?

A Who can say?

B The asylum

A So what?

B Who will visit me?

A I will

B You don’t count

A I never counted

B Only up to 4. Like MONBODDO’s savages

A Clever cunt

B I’ve read your books too. Cunt-breath

A Are you a match for me?

B Only you know

A Clever. Clever cunt

B I don’t like to be called cunt

A I’m sorry

B It’s aggressive

A What isn’t?

B Not that. OK?

A Deep underwater

B Shallow water

A Cry for me

B It’s been a while

A Far too long

B My dentist

A Your student dentist

B Never again

A It was just a job

B You fucking clown!

A A job is a job

B A blowjob

A Please

B A slow blowjob

A Why tease?

B Languorous blow…job. Blowjob, blowjob, BLOWJOB!

A That’s not nice

B Blowjob blackout

A Be careful

B Blowjob backhand

A Deep underwater

B Shallow water

A All over again

B You started it

A I had hopes

B You’re a fucking dreamer!

A I am

B And a clown

A Am I?

B First a clown

A Funny

B No. Droll

A Strange

B As fuck

A Why don’t we

B Let me think

A Fuck

B Fuck it. Why don’t we fuck?

A For a change

B Change of what?

A Feelings

B Walk away

A Walk away?

B Walk away


B I’d shoot you

A If what

B I had a gun

A Here

B What’s that

A A gun

B Bang

A I’m dead

B That changed nothing

A Deep underwater

B Shallow water

A Feel better?

B That changed nothing

A Deep underwater

B That changed nothing

A Deep underwater

B Nothing changed

A You didn’t do it right

B So what? Nothing changed

A It’s connected

B You and your connections

A Everything is about connections

B Let me try again, you tricky fuck

A You’ll only fuck up again

B What’s it to you?

A I couldn’t take another fuck-up

B Another fuck but not a fuck-up

A You see the connection?

B No. No ropes, no chains, no connections

A Only things

B My things and your things

A Let go of

B My things?

A All things

B Fuck me then

A In the middle of this?

B There’s no middle

A Deep underwater

B Shallow water

A Temp work

B Never again

A Temping worked

B Not for me

A For us

B Us is a non-entity

A You and Me

B Me and You

A Lift your skirt

B I’m not wearing one

A Lift it anyway

B There

A That was nice

B Fuck you!

A The way you flashed, didn’t hold it up

B A flash fuck might grab you then

A Please

B Flash fuck, fuck in a flash

A Flash in the pan

B Quick as a flash

A Flashy

B Flash Harry

A Flash Gordon

B Savior of the Universe

A Deep underwater

B Shallow water

A You and me

B I was never your friend

A No-one was

B What would you call us?

A You first

B Not lovers

A Why not?

B You never loved me

A But you loved me

B Even less

A But we made love

B Fucked

A We called it making love once

B We never existed

A And love?

B Fucking, making love, it’s the name of an act

A Deep underwater

B Fuck you. Shallow fucking blowjob water

A Your clit is magnificent

B Eat it motherfucker!

A Like a small cock

B Shallow water

A Deep underwater

B 19 years

A Of bliss

B Of this

A I gave you hope

B I’m full of it now

A I gave you things

B So what?

A You gave nothing

B You’re an addict

A For what?

B Anything

A Llamas?

B If a llama could give you pleasure, then yes

A Why down on pleasure?

B Your its addict

A Pleasure is good

B In moderation

A I never reached that level

B One taste and you’re off

A Off?

B Hoping never to return

A To where?

B Reality

A Deep underwater

B You had none at all until me

A Deep underwater

B You’re a fucking baby around me

A And a dreamer and a clown

B A clown first

A Then a dreamer?

B Then a baby

A A dreamer last

B You’d overdose on candy if you weren’t a dentist

A Deep underwater

B Shallow water

A It’s finished

B What is?

A The lamb

B The Llama?

A Walk away

B Clear me a space

A For what

B A spree. To clip my nails

A Toes or fingers?

B Both. Motherfucker

A Filing and painting?

B The whole shebang

A Deep underwater

B Shallow water

A Will you be messy

B Afraid of fever?

A It’s gone

B It’s always gone

A Everything’s gone

B It can come back

A Comeback jinny joe

B Comeback blow job

A Bring me back an eggy-o

B Fuck your entire line

A Don’t cry

B I hate you all

A How much?

B To the 17th century

A To where we were related

B See?

A I see nothing

B France?

A Losers

B Shallow water

A Deep underwater

B Magwitch

A Haversham

B Shallow water

A Deep underwater

B No to it all

A Might as well be yes

B But never broken up. Intermingled.

A Let’s break it up

B You fucking dreamer

A Smile for me

B I’ll grimace if you smile

A I don’t smile

B You smiled once

A When it rained

B On my tits? No. When your father died

A Cruel cunt

B He didn’t like anyone

A He’s in heaven

B Why?

A Because I smiled

B Your little boxing gloves

A Where’s this famous grimace?

B Where’s the smile?

A Fuck it

B Fuck that

A Deep underwater

B Shallow water

A I smell scallions

B Your dinner

A “Where’s my dinner?!”

B Oh, darling. Forget him. He’s dead now

A Stone dead

B Stone dead

A Stones last forever

B Oh (sighs)!

A I love you

B Fucking clown

A But only your tits

B Never again

A Never again what

B I could have done much better

A Or much worse

B Then what did I do?

A You did worse AND better

B Big fucking eyes

A Bigger than your belly

B Yours. Not mine

A Mine the same

B Nothing is the same

A Clever cunt

B Your words. You…VOID!

A That’s me trying

B Well try harder

A To what?

B To be acceptable

A To whom?

B Me

A In what sense?

B I’ll settle for smell

A Deep underwater

B Shallow water

A Deep underwater

B I want to scream

A You’re only saying that

B Or touch a poisonous snake

A Deep underwater

B Shallow water

A You don’t have to speak

B Curlew Cry

A But not your cry

B Cry of a curlew

A Why not your cry?

B Isn’t curlew plaintive enough?

A I can’t imagine a curlew

B Fucking liar

A You make me one

B And a clown? A baby? A dreamer?

A Cough it up

B You mean break it up

A I want to intermingle

B Shallow water

A Deep underwater

B Over my dead body

A It wouldn’t matter

B Completely still?

A That would be better

B And the putrefaction?

A It might be nice

B Nice?

A Nice and disgusting

B I have a brain

A Maybe that’s the problem

B It’s in the way?

A In the way of yourself

B You mean in YOUR way

A That’s what I mean

B Say what you mean!

A Deep underwater

B Shallow forest water

A What forest

B THE forest

A Your brain?

B YOUR fucking brain

A I could fuck your brains out

B This is boring

A There’s nothing else

B We’ve been over this

A At least it’s comforting

B At least that much

A I’m sorry

B So am I

A You could have done better

B So could you

A At least we can be frank

B At least that much

A It’s not much

B It’s only weird for me

A For me too. It’s only weird.

B Are you happy?

A I was never happy

B I suspected as much

A Are you?

B Never

A I had no idea

B Now what?


A I could happily kill you now

B Shallow water

A Deep underwater


George Saitoh’s essays, fiction and poetry have appeared in Aeqai, Kyoto Journal, Orbis, Clarion and Word Riot. My plays have been performed in Tokyo and Dublin. He has a doctorate from the University of York and teach at Waseda University in Tokyo. He was born in Dublin.

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